Longitude Crossed the Line This Time, They Have Such a Bad Lattitude
The Prime Meridian-
I’ll try to stay fairly impartial in reporting this story but, I fear it won’t be too difficult to make out what my position is on the events that unfolded.
This picture seems to fit but, in all honesty, it was hard to find an image that made a a geographic coordinate that specifies the east–west position of a point on the Earth’s surface look like it has a bad attitude.
Early Monday morning at precisely 51.4779° N, 0.0015° W, the prime meridian, Longitude sent a rather roundabout text message to their current significant other, Rand Paul. Yes, that Rand Paul. If you don’t know who that Rand Paul is, it’s this Rand Paul. Longitude sent Rand a text out of nowhere which read, “Bae, I just feel like my life is going in a different direction than when we first met and I think we should go our separate ways.”
This would be a tough text for anyone to receive and an especially hard pill to swallow for someone with such a weak constitution that they opted for a career in politics. Again we are referring to Rand Paul. The United States Senator responded after but a moment of deliberation. “Heckin wut u say? I thought we had something!” said the Senator. Longitude has still yet to send Rand Paul a message back thus, proving that Longitude does, in fact, have quite a bad lattitude.
This article has been brought to you by the Council for Poorly Thought Out Cartographic Quips and not by Rand Paul.
-A Well-Mannered Scholar